When It Rains It Pours

I’ve said before that I sometimes think that the area where I live should be called “nutjob hills” and every once in a while I run into yet more proof that this is indeed the case.

Take for example recent events. (names concealed to protect the terminally stupid) idiot is caught by his wife when he’s searching for diet pills that he plans on ordering and then presenting to her at the same time he tells her he thinks she needs to drop a few pounds.

Wife of idiot is understandably p*ssed and throws him out of the house. Odds are that he’s destined to spend at least a week in a motel about thirty miles away (that’s the closest one) cooling his heels until his wife decides to let him inside again.

Then she orders “manhood pills” for him as a way to get back at him for the insult to her dignity by reminding him to take them every day for the next six months along with whatever other “benefit” she might get from them.

Then a few minutes ago my phone rang. It’s idiot. He wants me to intervene on his behalf and explain to wife that the only reason he was getting the kind that’s made for women is that he read somewhere that those are the best weight loss pills available since apparently men don’t usually need anything nearly as strong due to metabolism differences.

Ok, he’s actually right about part of that, I’ve found out in the course of my own efforts to lose weight that men usually do actually have higher metabolism and can therefore burn off weight easier.

However not only do I not want to get involved in their fight, I know he’s full of sh*t because regardless of what his wife may or may not need, HE doesn’t need to lose weight. The guy is six feet tall and weighs 150 pounds fully dressed and soaking wet.

There’s no way I’m gonna believe that he was getting that stuff for himself. Not even almost by accident.

[Tags]idiot, humor, weight loss, fight, stay in motel, locked out[/tags]

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